my writing: October 2018


photograph of the day: 10/22/18

Location: Victoria. Vancouver Island, British Columbia, Canada. 

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The narrative that we portray on our daily discourse can have a profound effect on our lives. The choice of words that we use to describe ourselves and our involvement in our surrounding landscape can influence the light of consciousness. When we use methods of interaction like modesty when credit's offered to your expense, most of us utilize modesty to accept the kind gesture. Varying on the individual, this can be a tightrope of the subconscious and emotional state, molding a way of perception of the self that can cause more harm than good. 

When we use phrases like, "Oh, it's just a song I wrote" or, " I don't believe I'm that good." Our reaction can come from a place of sincere kindness and in a none narcissistic manner. There are some instances that the self-perception could also stem from a lack of confidence, self-esteem, or a troubled mind. The complexity of the human psychological headspace can hold the capacity to develop a magnitude of multiple connections concerning experiences throughout its existence. Depending on the circumstances one encounters throughout their journey through the landscape of the unknown, the neurological conduits that'll subconsciously play a role in one's reaction to the world can showcase traits to be concerned of. The word in itself might seem harmless to administer vocally, but it can be an indicator of a part of yourself that isn't aligned to the best of your intentions. 

When you comment on yourself by not giving enough credit to something that you worked so hard on, you're doing yourself a disservice. Taking the initiative to be proud of what you've created or are involved in should be praised with utmost enthusiasm. As long as you understand the threshold of being kind and egotistical, it's healthy to express love for what you feel strongly about. Don't be afraid to give yourself credit. It's completely understandable that when you're in the weeds of fabricating an entity that'll take place in the physical world, you might feel self-conscious about unveiling your work to the public. Within that train of thought, there's no space of discrediting yourself and in what you do. Enjoy the creative ride and be a part of the beautiful experience that's associated with being a light of consciousness exploring the possibilities of what the mind can envision.


photograph of the day: 10/24/18

Location: Juan de Fuca Marine Trail. Vancouver Island, British Columbia, Canada

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As we progress throughout our journey's in the abyss of the unknown, the ability to create the infrastructure that'll produce a means of support is crucial to the entity we want to become. The intention of constructing the bedrock of love and compassion that can only exist within the realm of family and close friends is vital to the emotional state which influences the subconscious being within us. The importance of these close ties is priceless regarding value. Being the social creatures we are, the premise of understanding we need to be in this journey together is what provides the substance to inspire our imagination and courage to explore, grow, and become more than we could ever imagine. 

The challenging periods I've experienced throughout the past two years has been trying on my capabilities as the individual I've grown to become. Instances of uncertainty, lack of clarity, and the growing concern of not being able to rationalize a plan to help my despairing position became energy that submitted my conscious being to the ground. My headspace started to believe the negative narrative that my subconscious mindset spoke in large volume. My history of being able to support positive emotional control over myself has been less than ideal for my well being. The effort of keeping a sense of my mental state in check deteriorated as time ran its course. There's only so much I can do. I reached out to close friends to provide a means to trying to get away from the negative energy that's slowly permeating in my conscious state of being. Without hesitation, a loving, supporting hand came to my aid. 

We will all go through difficult and trying times throughout our lives. Most of us are in a position where the unknown is inevitable. We all vary with our capabilities in dealing with adversity. When the threshold of mental and emotional structures are breached, receiving a helping hand is a gift beyond comprehension within the moment. The love and appreciation that we possess is truly remarkable and speaks volumes towards our loved ones. There will be instances where you'll need to be the support those closest to you will require. Luckily, that very energy can be transferred towards your moments of adversity, which in the end help you continue the journey you want to pursue ultimately. 


photograph of the day: 10/29/18

Location: Botanical Beach. Vancouver Island, British Columbia, Canada. 

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The pressure of living with the emotional pallet we embody alongside our subconscious entity can possess a power over our conscious headspace that's uncanny. Being within the present moment with our current thoughts going through our mental peripheral, the capability of a subsystem that's intergral for our well-being controls a great deal of who we are as a person. We can make decisions based on various situations that come our way throughout the day; what we want to eat, what we want to wear, what we want to watch on tv. What about the moments where challenges present themselves, adversity takes the better part of you, and it's difficult to get away from the oppressing nature of the present situation. The subconscious entity can overcome and provide a means of a solution, but what happens when that conditioned entity works against your best interest when all the dust of a problematic period settles down. 

My upbringing was a beautiful introduction to life. My family has nothing but the intent of wanting what's best for me. My childhood friends gave me great memories that I'll cherish for as long as my working mind permits me too. My progression from childhood to adulthood has been a linear learning curve that's taught me so much about the world that surrounds me. With a normal upbringing and little traumatic experiences throughout my life, where does this conversation fit in my current reality? To this day I'm not entirely confident in knowing the answer. What I do recognize is the many instances where my innermost being had the last word in the narrative with myself and the challenge that I was facing. Situations of taking risks, moments of opportunities where potential beneficial gains laid beyond the horizon sits in the dark, away from my light of consciousness. Then there's the energy that comes from ignoring my subconscious narrative when I fail, that very energy becomes as harmful and oppressive for reasons beyond my comprehension. The results leave me in a state of denial of myself and what I'm capable of doing. 

As time goes on, I've developed methods of being aware of where my threshold lies with my mental headspace. To this present moment, I still don't have control over the energy my subconscious state can establish. I understand that the very words being fed through my attention span is merely a thought that I have the ability to let go. The impermanence of the neurological traffic that goes on through each day has to be recognized for what it is; some thoughts that will eventually be in the past, being irrelevant to the present and future experiences that's waiting for us to discover. We need to understand the validity of our intuitions, but we must also understand the nature of the adversity that faces us and what importance can derive from taking a chance and go against what our fears might say otherwise. Life is a continuous challenge that we must go through in order to fully embrace the gift of consciousness and let our true capabilities become the centerfold of our journey.


photograph of the day: 10/31/18

Location: Port Renfrew. Vancouver Island, British Columbia, Canada.

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The beautiful west coast ocean views that I’ve grown to love while being on this wonderful island.